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New beginnings 2010 issue 2
Michelle Stille, Milton, FL, USA
郑宇 译
Gabe was a little over a year when we decided to try to conceive our second baby. He was still nursing all day and all night and not very interested in eating other foods. I offered him the foods my husband and I were eating. I was breastfed for several years myself and his lack of interest in table food was normal to me. I knew he would eventually eat more foods, but I was very concerned that if I got pregnant and my milk supply decreased or disappeared, he would starve. Although I wanted to wait until Gabe was at least two to get pregnant again, with my husband Ryan’s future military deployments and frequent moves to plan around, we decided it would work out better to have a baby sooner.
我们决定要再生一个孩子的时候盖布刚刚一岁多一点。他仍然整天整夜要吃母乳,对其它食物不太感兴趣。我和我丈夫吃饭的时候,也会把我们吃的东西给他吃一点,但他兴趣不大。这点对我来说并不奇怪,因为我自己小时候也吃了很多年的母乳。我知道他总有一天会吃其它的食物,但是我很担心一旦我怀孕,我的乳汁减少或者甚至没有了的话,他会挨饿。尽管我本来想要等到盖布至少两岁才再怀孕,但为了我丈夫瑞安以后的军事部署和因此导致的频繁搬家做准备,尽快再生个孩子可能更理想。
I conceived again when Gabe was 18 months old. I really wanted Gabe to have as much milk as he wanted until he was two. I planned to continue nursing throughout my pregnancy and then to tandem nurse. My milk supply gradually decreased and Gabe slowly started eating other foods. My milk supply had dwindled by the time I was 18 weeks pregnant, but Gabe, 21 months old at the time, was still very keen on nursing. And he didn’t starve himself! He didn’t even appear to notice the drop in my milk supply. He just nursed as normal and ate food to make up for not getting nutrition from nursing. He was not a picky eater. He ate what the rest of the family ate. For this I am very thankful.
盖布18个月大的时候我再次怀孕了。我真心希望盖布能有充足的母乳吃到他两岁。我打算在整个孕期都继续哺乳,小宝宝出生以后再给他们一起进行手足哺乳。我的母乳量逐渐降低,而盖布也慢慢开始吃其它的食物。到我怀孕18周的时候,我的乳汁量已经变得很少了,而那时候21个月大的盖布仍然十分热衷于吃奶。他并没有挨饿。我甚至看不出他注意到了我的奶量已经减少了。他只是像往常一样吃奶,同时吃别的食物来补充没能通过吃奶获得的营养。他不挑食。他和我们吃相同的食物。对这一点我十分感激。
Nursing during pregnancy was not painful, although it was uncomfortable from time to time. I believed Gabe deserved to nurse and decided I was not going to wean. This mindset helped me get through the uncomfortable times. Nursing also made it easier to rest with a busy toddler. He was still waking often at night to nurse, which did make me more tired, but it was manageable. By the end of my pregnancy, Gabe was 27 months old and not nursing a lot. He was sleeping through the night and nursing in the morning and at nap and bedtime.
I knew I was going into labor when I nursed Gabe to sleep one evening, which made my still irregular contractions stronger. By the time he awoke the next morning, I was having regular contractions and had been in contact with my midwife. My husband took Gabe to my mom’s house across the street so that he would not want to nurse while I was having contractions.
孕期哺乳尽管有时会感到不大舒服,但也并不痛苦。我确信应该给盖布喂奶,所以决定不给他断奶。这种心态帮助我渡过了那些不舒服的时刻。孩子专注于吃奶,哺乳时我很容易地可以休息。他还是经常在夜里醒来要吃奶,这虽然令我更加疲劳,但也还是不难处理的。到我生产时,盖布已经27个月大,不需要频繁喂奶了。他会连续睡上一整晚,只在早上醒来、白天小睡时和晚上入睡前才吃奶。有天晚上我喂奶哄盖布睡觉,不规则的强烈宫缩提示我快要临产了。到第二天早上他睡醒的时候,我的宫缩已经规律起来,而且我已经联络过接生护士了。我丈夫带盖布去了街对面的外婆家,这样他就不会在我正在分娩时要求吃奶。
My daughter, Susanna, was born at home that afternoon. My mom and Gabe came over shortly after the birth and the first thing Gabe said was, “I want milk.” I was nursing Susanna at that time, but I let him latch on and I nursed them together.
我女儿苏珊娜那天下午在家里出生了。我妈妈和盖布在她出生以后不一会儿就过来了,盖布说的第一句话是,“我想吃奶。”那时我正给苏珊娜喂奶,但我还是让盖布也来吸吮我的乳头,给他们兄妹俩一起喂了奶。
During those first few days before my milk came in, my mom and Ryan tried to spend a lot of time with Gabe. I did not want him to nurse all the time, although I let him nurse as often as he had prior to Susanna’s birth. Unlike Gabe, who nursed every couple hours as a newborn, Susanna nursed continuously. I quickly reacquainted myself with nursing a baby in a sling! I later learned to nurse Gabe on the other side with Susanna in a sling. I learned how to do pretty much everything—cooking, helping Gabe use the bathroom, playing with Gabe, laundry—with Susanna nursing in the sling.I cannot think of another way to manage with a newborn and a toddler!
在开始的几天,我的乳汁还不够多的时候,我妈妈和瑞安尽量花更多的时间陪伴盖布。尽管我没有因为苏珊娜出生而改变给盖布喂奶的频率,我还是不希望他一直吃。盖布刚出生时每两个小时要喂一次奶,但苏珊娜不同,她是断断续续地吃。我很快重新让自己熟练地用背巾给抱在怀里的宝宝哺乳。后来我学会了用背巾抱着苏珊娜的同时给盖布在另一边乳房哺乳。我学会了一边给背巾里的苏珊娜哺乳一边做不少事情——做饭,帮盖布上厕所,和盖布玩,洗衣服。我想不出还有别的什么办法来同时喂养一个新生儿和一个大孩子。
We sleep in a family bed. We have a king-size futon and a twin futon on our bedroom floor. Gabe had been sleeping on the twin but moved himself back near me after Susanna’s birth, booting my husband to the twin. My husband doesn’t mind. I think he’s just glad that he gets to sleep all night, without waking to go get a baby who needs to nurse or to have to go comfort a toddler in another room. When the babies wake, they just nurse right there, not disturbing anyone. It can be a problem when Gabe wakes while Susanna is nursing because he has to wait. He accepts waiting but whines a little bit about it.
我们全家睡在一起。我们卧室的地板上有一张特大号的床垫和一张双人床垫。盖布以前睡在双人床垫上,但是自从苏珊娜出生以后他就自己挪回来靠着我睡了,我丈夫就睡到了双人床垫上。我丈夫并不介意。我想他很高兴能在夜里睡个整觉了,再不用爬起来把需要吃奶的宝宝抱过来或是不得不到另外的房间去哄大些的孩子。当孩子醒了,他们躺在原处就可以吃奶,不会打扰任何人。不过如果盖布醒的时候苏珊娜正在吃奶,就可能会有点问题。他可以等待,但是会对此稍有抱怨。
Sometimes I wake up nursing one of them with the other one whimpering and I’m not sure who is nursing and who is whimpering! Gabe started night waking again after Susanna was born, but by the time she was six weeks old, his night waking was minimal.
有时候我醒来给他们中的一个喂奶而另一个就在旁边哼唧,我也不确定是哪一个在吃奶哪一个在哼唧。苏珊娜出生以后盖布又开始夜里醒来要吃奶了,但是到苏珊娜六个星期大的时候他吃夜奶的次数就非常少了。
Gabe has shown only positive feelings toward Susanna. I know this is because he does not feel like he was replaced, and because his needs have been met. When she cries, her needs always come first and he seems to understand this. He is capable of carrying on a conversation and will say, “Susanna’s fussing, Susanna needs milk.” By seeing me tend to her immediately when she fusses, Gabe is learning how to take care of a baby. I suspect that he knows anyway but now he is seeing it from the outside instead of always being the one taken care of.
盖布对苏珊娜表现得很友善。我知道这是因为我们没有让他有被替代的感觉,他的需要都能得到满足。当苏珊娜哭的时候,她的需求总会排在前面,而盖布似乎能够理解。他能够与我们交谈,并且会说:“苏珊娜着急了,苏珊娜要吃奶。”通过看着我在苏珊娜不安的时候立刻去照顾她,盖布也学习着如何照顾小宝宝。尽管他只是在旁观,但我猜想他会慢慢理解,不再总是被照顾的那一个了。
We talked a lot about having a baby before she was born and he was accustomed to seeing babies and toddlers nurse at La Leche League meetings. I had a family member staying with me full time until Susanna was one month old.
在苏珊娜出生前,我们经常聊起会有一个小宝宝,而且他在国际母乳会的聚会上已经适应了看到小宝宝和大孩子一起吃奶。我一直到苏珊娜满月前都有一个家人时刻陪在我身边。
We staggered the grandmas’visits and my husband takingtime off work so that someone would always be here with me but the house would never be full of people. This worked out very well and I don’t know how I could have managed without someone to help me that first month! My helper primarily played with Gabe, which he loved.
我们将祖母的探访和我丈夫的休假交错开来,这样就总有人在我身边帮忙,又不至于让屋子里有很多人。这个方法十分有效。在第一个月,要是没人帮忙,我的日子就会非常艰难。我的帮手主要是陪盖布玩耍,盖布也很喜欢这样。
I think it would be much more challenging to have a weaned two-year-old and a newborn. Like any mom with two so young, I am always busy but in a positive way. I spend my time nursing and playing with my babies, as well as accomplishing basic household tasks. With Gabe’s needs met, I haven’t had to spend time preventing him from hitting the baby or managing temper tantrums. I have prioritized my household tasks and only set out to do the most important ones: grocery shopping, cooking nutritious meals, and laundry. My husband does the dishes and anything else that must be done.
我想如果是同时照顾一个已经离乳的两岁孩子和一个新生儿,一定会困难得多。和任何带两个很小的宝宝的妈妈一样,我总是很忙碌但是我会用更积极的方式。我花时间喂奶和陪伴宝宝玩耍,同时我也花时间完成基本的家务。因为盖布的需求都能得到满足,我不必再花时间去防备他会打小宝宝或是应付他发脾气。我把我要做的家务按重要性排了序,然后只着手处理最重要的:日常用品采购,煮营养餐和洗衣服。我丈夫承担了饭后洗碗和其他所有必须做的部分。
Gabe did start eating less and nursing more after Susanna’s birth, especially after the first month when I was alone with the children at home all day. He gradually started eating more as time went on. My mom tandem nursed my sister and me and has always told me it is very normal for a toddler to nurse more after the birth of a sibling.
苏珊娜出生以后盖布开始吃更少的其他食物和更多的母乳,尤其在第一个月以后当我整天独自和孩子们呆在家里时。随着时间过去他渐渐地开始吃更多别的食物。我的妈妈就曾给我和我的姐妹一起喂奶,她总是对我说一个大孩子,在小弟弟或者小妹妹出生后要更多地吃奶,是正常的。
I do tell Gabe “no” sometimes when he wants to nurse. He usually accepts this or waits without much of a fuss.
有时盖布想要吃奶我也会跟他说不行。他通常能接受我的拒绝或者带着小小的不满等待一会儿。
If I could have spaced the gap between my children however I wanted, not having to worry about other factors, I would have waited to get pregnant until my youngest was at least two.
如果我那时候能够按照我的意愿拉大两个孩子的年龄间隔,而不需要考虑其他因素,我会等到最小的孩子至少两岁再怀孕。
However, it is no bad thing having two under-threes—it is just very, very busy! I sleep when they sleep and I am not exhausted. I am happy to spend all my time with my two healthy, thriving children.
然而,有两个不到三岁的孩子其实没什么不好——只是非常,非常忙碌!他们睡觉时我也睡觉,我没有感到透支。我很高兴把时间全都花在我两个健康强壮的孩子身上。